Worn Out

You know when you have just weekends in a row that are packed with things to do, in addition to your already usually busy weeks?

That’s what April has been for me. And will continue to be.

And to make it worse, I’ve been feeling some pressure of trying to complete this 20,000 word goal for Camp NaNoWriMo that had potential to be feasible, but when working on a story I am not excited about and have not plotted out, and when so busy, well, I have found myself falling further and further behind my daily average word count. I think I’m going to decrease my goal word count, to 10,000 but it feels like a cop-out.

I could try to push myself harder for 20,000 words, but I don’t want to push myself in ways I don’t need to be pushed. I needed it in November. Right now, I really just need to edit and improve my NaNoWriMo project, and then once I finally get it off to some beta readers so THEN I can think about something else IF I want to. I thought I might reach that place by this month but I didn’t, and so now the edits have been delayed by forcing myself to write for a story that I am not as interested in as that one. And when it comes to blogging, I feel I’m in a pre-slump, as Stormy put it recently. I’m afraid I might burn out soon. But I think I can avoid it.

And I think the way to avoid is may be to post less over the next month or so… and not beat myself over it.

I already post less than I want to due to time. I try to post three times a week, but I would prefer four times, and sometimes I end up at two times a week. And I feel guilty when that happens. But I don’t get upset with others when they need to slow down or take a break. So I hope and assume you would all feel the same about me.

So for the rest of April and possibly through May, expect even less activity here. I will post only when I absolutely want to, meaning not because I want new comments (because confession: sometimes that’s my motivation) ,but because I have a post that I am excited to share. Who knows, that might mean one week I’ll post 3 times and the next week I won’t post anything.

Meanwhile, I need to focus on editing my November NaNo project, focus on other life stuff, and take each day one step at a time.

kitty-desk
This is basically me.

So this is not an official break or hiatus, but please be patient with me as I try to get my mojo back. I probably would have stopped this a while ago if all of you weren’t so awesome, so thank you for that!

18 Responses to Worn Out

  1. You have to do what you have to do for YOU! That is my main motto in life 🙂

    That is one of the reasons that when I started my blog I told myself that I would not make a “post-this-many-times-a-week” rule. Then it would be me posting not because it was something I was excited about, but because I felt like I needed too and then it would somehow become less of a hobby and more of a job!

    Blogging should always be fun, and I love reading your blog! NaNoWriMo is a super daunting thing, and I applaud anyone who can write their own stories!

  2. I think that’s cool that you can recognize that you need a break and give yourself permission to focus on what you need to. Also, that is a super cute cat picture! It’s the same breed as a cat I used to have so now I’m all nostalgic 🙂

  3. You should never feel bad about how much or how little you post. A blog is a hobby and there is absolutely no reason to ever stress out about it. I hope the rest of your NaNoWriMo project goes well. I imagine it can be quite hard to continue writing something that isn’t holding your interest. Rest and be well!

  4. There is a big difference in pushing yourself to stay motivated and pushing yourself beyond what is reasonable to achieve. Enjoy your break and hopefully your book will take a new direction that will excite you more 🙂

  5. I feel like I could’ve written this post! Your April and mine sounds identical, except for the NaNo part 😉 But I feel like the Downton Abbey gif “What is a weekend?” because of how it all blends together busyness-wise. And pre-slump is the PERFECT description of how I feel. We’ll beat it! And I know you can do so much, but I agree with the other commenters, motivation is pushing yourself beyond the limits are different things. It’s okay if you don’t finish NaNo or finish what you thought you would be doing!

    • Thanks for the encouragement, Summer! And I’m glad I’m not alone! I hope you can push through your pre-slump too, and I’m sure you will!

  6. I don’t really care about post length sometimes anymore, haha. It’s supposed to be ablog, and if I post something miscellaneous and worthless, whatever. It’s a blog, not a book, and if you really want to post 4 times a week, you can do that if you post miscellaneous things.

    And if writing isn’t working out for you, just ditch what you’re working on and edit that November piece! Let your mind have a break and just do what you want to do. I mean, look at me. I quit by Day 4.

    • I’ve been taking a break from writing over these past few days, but I am going to try write a little bit more before the end of the month. But I am also definitely going to focus more on editing my November project!

  7. I know how you feel (which I’ve been so slacking on leaving blog comments lately — I’m sorry!). 🙁 I hope things calm down for you soon! <3

  8. I wonder if this time of year is just generally a busier time? I know I’ve been feeling the time crunch lately too, and haven’t been as active with blogging because of it. If there’s one thing I’ve learning though, it’s that we’d all rather see bloggers who post infrequently rather than bloggers who push themselves to a breaking point.

    So take all of the time you need to feel refreshed/less stressed!

    • Thanks, Kelly! There might be something to this time of year… we’re all getting out of our lethargic winter lifestyle and keeping busy!

  9. I know how you feel- I would never critique someone else for posting less than their usual amount but when it comes to me and my blog I get so critical with myself at times if I don’t post as many times as I’d like or if I don’t have many posts scheduled for the following week. Good luck with your project & I hope it works out!

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